Fear of Childbirth 
Fear of childbirth is common today. And how can we not be afraid? With all the images we see depicting birth as a traumatic ordeal, what else are we to think? We are constantly bombarded on television and in movies with images of screaming women who are cursing their partners until they get their epidural. Everywhere we turn we are inundated with horrific tales of childbirth... from family, friends, strangers. How can we change this? How can we break the cycle of fear and begin letting go of fear? The odds certainly seem against us in the majority of birth scenarios in the hospital. Over one third of pregnant women who enter the hospital are given cesareans. Have we evolved so we can't give birth? I have a problem with accepting that answer. I've birthed seven children just fine after my own cesarean.
When it got really intense, I begged for a half dose of fentanyl, thinking it would give me a modicum of relief. Nope. It just dimmed the beginnings of the contractions so the peak hit me like a ton of bricks. This was the first labor that truly taught me to listen to my body. My son was posterior throughout labor. As I hit transition, I really wanted to lie down. Everyone encouraged me not to, and instead we used the birthing stool. I felt him moved down into my pelvis while sitting on the stool. I still felt I needed to lie down. When I did, the contractions were more painful, and I ended up writhing around all over the bed. But I think I needed to do that so he could turn the right way. With the fourth, most of the way through my labor I decided I needed an intrathecal. This is a variation of the epidural with a side effect of terrible itching. I was so into labor land that even though I wanted it, all I could say was I wanted that thing that started with "i"... the anesthesiologist was busy with another patient, and I never got it. I was horribly disappointed when he walked in and I was starting to push. He walked right out again without a word. Guess what? I survived! Yes, it was intense. Yes, it was a bit painful. But the baby was born, and I ended up surviving just fine. I recovered quickly from that birth, even though I was a bit in shock afterwards. The labor progressed so quickly and my daughter was born so quickly that I was still in laborland. I remember sitting alone on the bed twiddling with the umbilical cord that was still attached to the as yet unborn placenta while everyone was clustered around my daughter on the examining table. My next one was our first homebirth. I was not afraid this time. I had done it. When I was tired in early labor, I went to bed and slept. Really slept! When I woke up in the middle of the night, it was time to get down to business. I focused, I breathed, I told myself I could do this just like the millions of women did before me all through history. I prayed for confidence in my natural ability to do what a woman's body was designed to do. And you know what? I did it again! I won't lie... during late pregnancy, I still worry about the potential pain. I think the potential of pain is worse than the actual pain. Once labor begins, I relax and welcome each sensation. I rest when I need it. I eat and drink to keep up my energy. I listen to my body... if it wants to upright, that's what I do. Maybe I lean on the wall, or rock on my birth ball. Maybe I just pace back and forth. I know when it is time to change because the contractions get a little too intense, so it is time to try something else. Confidence is a tool that truly helps a woman get through labor. Have you heard about Orgasmic Birth? Some women find labor so pleasurable that they actually climax as the baby is born. This is not a myth. While I haven't experienced it myself, some women really do get a birth like this. I think it all lies in how they expect their labor to go. Instead of expecting pain, they expect to welcome each sensation and go with it. They are relaxed and confident. If we could all let go of our birthing worries, maybe this would happen for more women.
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